Loving myself through the tough moments

Phew it’s been a tough weekend! I’ve been on some fab training around using EFT for menopause and because everything our womb goes through can affect our experience of menopause, the training brought up some quite triggering things. It was also rather ironically timed, being on the first 2 days of my period so all triggers were multiplied by 10! My period often brings with it lots of strong emotions, it shows up my deepest wounds and if I’m not attending to my own needs, it can leave me feeling very lonely. Unfortunately the timing isn’t always right for giving myself what I really need (a day in bed with a hot water bottle) and sometimes falls right in the middle of some training I’ve had booked for ages!

The combination of things left me feeling quite lost, pulled backwards into some old patterns in a way that made it difficult to tap alone because some inner protectors were taking charge of my words. I’ve noticed this with tapping, most of the time I can do it by myself but if I’m deep in the difficult stuff I sometimes need my practitioner to help with the words.

What I really needed this weekend and what I managed to squeeze in in between the training was some really cosy, gentle self nurturing until the hormones eased off and I was able to get everything back into perspective.

Coming out of that experience on Sunday and diving straight into our tapping around being worthy and deserving of my big dreams on Monday really highlighted some deep fears I have around my biggest dream - growing the Healing Womanhood community. As I tapped to tune into the part that objects to me fulfilling my dream I felt very clearly the fear of what happens if I grow this wonderful community and then I get triggered and need to go into deep rest for a few days.

Because I was still feeling fragile from the weekend’s explorations I did find myself getting quite attached to this worry, in other words, believing it. I began to realise then that I’ve been held back by a belief that I can’t manage or ‘look after’ a thriving community. My frightened part showed me a time in my teens when I certainly wouldn’t have been able to support anyone through anything because I was really going through it myself, in fact that’s the time in my life when I began to learn and develop the techniques I now use to support myself and others.

I was able to reflect that authenticity through times of triggers is what creates space and permission within the community for others to show up authentically too, to share their own vulnerability. I wondered if maybe never being triggered or never being open about being triggered might make the whole community a bit pointless because it would create an unrealistic façade and there would be no depth to it.

As I backed up the tapping with this week’s meditation I found that a lot of my worries had cleared and that I was able to use most of the time to spend time in the reality of our growing community, feeling how it feels to have a loving, safe and connected corner of the internet filled with people who feel like home, who love digging deeper into their own experience and who are there to give each other a boost and the loving acceptance we all so often need.

If you’d like to do this week’s tapping and meditation or to join our growing community you can find everything at patreon.com/healingwomanhood

For one to one sessions with me visit healingwomanhood.com/book-online